The 4 stages

Since arriving in Canada last October I have felt myself going through a lot of inner struggles. I wanted to just get here, enjoy the experience from the get go and for things to be easy and happy. Unfortunately, reality is that I go from being totally elated to a blubbering mess, content one minute to totally distraught the next. It’s true, I am struggling despite being very happy to be here. I am an emotional person anyway and have always worn my heart on my sleeve so I’m used to emotion and am not at all surprised by it, but I do feel a little disappointed in myself for not being able to let go and relax into my new life here.

I remember reading something about 4 distinct phases people go through when living abroad before we left Australia - so I was somewhat prepared for this inner turmoil. I wasn’t prepared however, for how quickly those stages would occur in me and furthermore, how strong the feelings associated would be.

For those who aren’t familiar with this theory here is a basic rundown…

Stage 1 – Elation

Everything is new and exciting  and you can’t believe you are here. The novelties are abundant - stuff your family and friends back home look what they’re missing out on. You are still in holiday mode.

Stage 2 – Resistance

Reality sets in - the holiday is over and now you have to get into some sort of routine. You miss your family & friends and constantly compare things between here and home… Home is definitely winning.

Stage 3 – Transformation

You settle down and become more familiar with your new surroundings. Things that seemed foreign before are somewhat common now and you’re comfortable for now.

Stage 4 – Integration

The bridging is complete and you now appreciate both your heritage and  your new lifestyle. You realise the great opportunities this has and will continue to bring you.

I hope I can complete the 4 stages of ‘acculturation’ as they call it, because apparently a lot of people get stuck in the resistance stage and remain there until they go back to their home country. I can totally understand how this could happen as I have felt myself there for the past couple of months… I do feel the transformation starting to come into play though.

It hasn’t been easy on D having to listen me stuck in the second stage for so long – that BASTARD has already arrived at stage 4! But I can’t hide my true feelings for long and honestly, I wouldn’t want to. I really want to get everything out of this experience before we go home. Fingers crossed I can work through it and finish our time here having squeezed everything I possible could from my life here. Time is the key and I know that as time passes it will only get better and better!

Happy Australia Day!

So it's Australia Day back at home and being in Canada we don't get to celebrate like we usually would - with a lot of drinks, sausage sizzle, trip to the beach or a creek and our friends and family close. We both also have to work so no huge celebrations are on the cards for us.

I thought it would be nice to share some of our Aussie favourites with our new Canadian friends so made some Lamingtons to take to work. I've put the recipe below these are the tits!

The lamingtons I made, took so damn long!

AUSSIE LAMINGTONS

Cake
125g butter, softened

1 cup caster sugar

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 eggs
1 3/4 cups self-raising flour, sifted
1/2 cup milk

Icing

3 1/2 cups icing sugar mixture

1/4 cup cocoa powder

1 tablespoon butter, softened

1/2 cup boiling water
2 cups desiccated coconut

Step 1

Preheat oven to 180°C/160°C fan-forced. Grease a square cake pan.Using an electric mixer, beat butter, sugar and vanilla until light and fluffy. Add eggs, 1 at a time, beating well after each addition (mixture may curdle).

Step 2

Sift half the flour over butter mixture. Stir to combine. Add half the milk. Stir to combine. Repeat with remaining flour and milk. Spoon into prepared pan. Smooth top. Bake for 30 minutes or until a skewer inserted in centre comes out clean. Stand in pan for 10 minutes. Turn out onto a wire rack. Cover with a clean tea towel. Set aside overnight.

Step 3

Make icing: Sift icing sugar and cocoa into a bowl. Add butter and boiling water. Stir until smooth.

Step 4

Cut cake into 15 pieces. Place coconut in a dish. Using a fork, dip 1 piece of cake in icing. Shake off excess. Toss in coconut. Place on a wire rack over a baking tray. Repeat with remaining cake, icing and coconut. Stand for 2 hours to set.

We also managed to find a bottle of Bundaberg Rum at the local liquor store for less than what you pay at Dan Murphys in Australia.

We were soooo excited when we found this - D wanted Aussie beer but this was better!

What Australia Day would be complete without the foreign owned Kraft Vegemite on sandwiches?? I've been eating this stuff (like most Aussies) since I can remember. Theres home video of me sitting in a highchair with barely any teeth munging down on this stuff on toast - I LOVE it! So, I also made some to take to work and surprisingly, the Canadians didn't hate it - but I don't think they're gonna go out and buy a jar for themselves either...

The iconic Vegemite

I didn't expect to miss Australia so much or so soon, but as every day passes me by I am grateful to be here in Canada, living out the dream that D & I had for for so long. I think tonight we will watch one of our favourite Australian movies, The Castle - it always has us in stitches :)

The List

For those of you who know me well you know I am pretty organised. I wouldn't say my house is the cleanest or my drawers are the tidiest but I do like to plan out things in great detail. I almost always have a back up plan and go to great lengths to analyse any possible situations or outcomes based on my decisions. I am a thinker, an analyser and a total stress head, so it's only natural that after the initial shock of living in a new country I would develop a list of things I would like to experience while here.

D & I are in the midst of figuring out our plans for the future - ie when will we go back to Australia, what will we do there, where will we live etc. This has obviously been brought on by my constant need to know what my next step is - it hasn't always been in the right direction either, I am constantly side stepping but despite feeling like I was standing still for a long time I like to think I haven't gone backwards many times.

Anyhow, back to the point, I am a planner by nature and I like to have a clear picture in my mind of what is on the cards for me. I'm not saying one or two years in Canada will give me all the answers that 26 years in Australia couldn't give me, but I see this as a good opportunity to see and do as much as I can in a short amount of time. This list isn't Canada exclusive and it's not in order... I might also add more things as I think of them but this is the list so far (a few things have already been completed)...


My List

• Get a job - I don't care what I do as long as i'm working to pay for the experiences I want to have.
• Rent a place by ourselves - after living at home for over 2 years we are ready for independence.
• Obtain drivers license and get a car - I'm trying to find a way around surrendering our Aussie licences but we definitely want a car to explore our surroundings.
• Learn a new skill/hobby to take home with me - I don't really have any interests other than organising holidays which are temporary highs followed by long drawn out lows of reality. I'm very fickle and set out with good intentions but find it hard to stick to anything (apart from D) I'd love to find a passion.
• See an NHL game (ice hockey) - I just wanna see some body-checks and hot men with no teeth!
• Experience dog sledding - I miss my dog (otherwise knows as my son) so much I can't explain it. I would love to spend some time with the sled dogs of Canada - even though I will probably cry...
• Go to the Calgary Stampede - When we live 15 mins from Calgary this would be a stupid thing to leave off the list, after all it's described as 'The Greatest Outdoor Show on Earth'.
• See Banff & Jasper NP - 2 of the most famous parks in the world it would be a crime to come to Canada & not go there, especially since they are both in Alberta.
• Photograph the Northern Lights - I'm not sure what our chances are of this as it isn't something I can control (drives me NUTS BTW) and we are quite far south in terms of where the Aurora Borealis is usually visible, but who knows we may get lucky here, or take a drive further North but who knows what the weather will be doing.
• Dig for fossils in Drumheller - it's a dinosaur graveyard, can't get much cooler than that.
• See a real prairie sunset - I mean no mountains, no hills, just flat as far as the eye can see in every direction, don't care where just wanna see it!
• View Mt McKinley in Denali NP - D & I have a slight obsession with National Parks and mountains, I would love to see the highest peak on the continent in one of the true wildernesses left on Earth - Alaska, but apparently constant cloud cover makes this difficult, we will see!
• Encounter a bear or a moose or both in the wild - Again not something I can control... D has seen both and i'm jealous.
• Go to the East Coast of Canada & USA inc Niagara Falls - Both times we have been to the states, and now living in Canada we are on/near the west coast. While we are here I would LOVE to see the other side of the continent.
• Visit Vancouver & Victoria - My old boss said that Victoria (not the Aussie version) is one of the most amazing places he had ever been. For someone as well traveled as he was that is saying something, so I wanna go see what all the fuss is about.
• Witness the geothermal wonders of Yellowstone NP - for YEARS D and I have been dreaming of going to the world's first national park, and unfortunately it has always been just out of reach due to it's remoteness and the fact it's frozen solid for over 6 months of the year. We now live a 10 hr drive from there and we are GOING to visit!
• Spend a Canadian winter somewhere in Mexico - Apparently this is the thing to do to escape the severe cold, i'm so there :)
• Be content and live in the moment - sounds easy but for a person like me who is never satisfied and lives in the future this is probably the hardest one of the whole list

My thoughts about Canada thus far...

I'd call myself fairly well travelled. I've visited a few countries to this point and feel I have a good understanding of how others in our world live. The reason I wanted to do this working holiday is because I had a lot of questions rolling around in my head and in my heart that would have remained unanswered had I not done it. I left not knowing whether I would return to Australia because of all the things I was feeling at the time. I was discontent, feeling the pressure of my age/position in life & responsibilities that come with it - mortgage, kids, career etc. As discussed in previous posts i'm a small town girl, but i'd hate to think that I was small or narrow minded. I wasn't ready for any of those things at that point and I wanted to see what was out there in the world that I could be missing out on..

As it turns out, you can take the girl out of Australia but you can't take Australia out of the girl. Since living abroad I have been filled with an amazing sense of Aussie pride that didn't exist before. Anytime I see or hear something Australian I get chills and smile. I get so excited about it. I know it's dumb but I can't help it!

I've now been in Canada for 3 months - not long at all, and although that definitely does NOT make me an expert by any means on the inner workings of this country I have come up with a list of VERY SUPERFICIAL loves and loathes as compared to my Australian experience thus far.... i'm sure there will be many items to add to this list further down the track.



LOVES

• The people - sure there are dropkicks wherever you go but this is one stereotype that rings true, Canadians are extremely polite, friendly and helpful people
• The snow - ok so i'm getting over this one as the long winter (that started in OCTOBER) drags on but there is no denying there is something very romantic about the snow and cool air filling your lungs
• The adventure - I LOVE seeing new places and meeting new people but I am a bit of a loner and homebody. I'm hoping this experience broadens my horizon
• The scenery - it's a gorgeous country that I can't wait to see more of. Being 1 1/2 hours from Banff is a dream and I still can't believe we are here
• The low low prices - EVERYTHING is cheaper than Australia!

LOATHES

• The lack of savoury pies - seriously people how hard is it to replace that apple or cherry filling with some chicken, chilli and mango-oh-go i've done it, i'm literally salivating. God I miss the good old Aussie pie!
• Idiot drivers - yeah I know, we get these in Australia too but they're usually Japanese tourists... Sorry i'm being a bit racist there... I meant Asians hehe. The drivers here can't park to save their lives and think it's appropriate to do 150km/h in icy conditions and poor visibility in their mega lifted pick up trucks. Slow down dickheads!
• The cold - minus 30? Seriously!
• Missing my friends and family - this is a no brainer but it's the biggn'. I miss my dog, I miss my mum, dad, sister, brother and all my friends. Wish I could have packed them all in my suitcase and brought them with me, it would make this amazing experience so much better than it already is!

O Canada... our home and something land...

Our first white Christmas & new year

Last Christmas I was with my whole family in a holiday house at Rainbow Beach. It was hot, loud and I had a great time. We had never all gone away together for the holidays and it's something I hope we do again in the future. This year Christmas was a different experience entirely. We went from being one room away from my family to an ocean and then some apart. It was so quiet and cold.... -20 celcius to be exact.

-20 celcius, unseasonably cold for the area apparently

Despite the fact we were in the throws of winter with snow, ice, lights, carols ie a 'real' Chrristmas, it didn't feel like Christmas at all. We managed to get a discount tree to out up which helped in creating some kind of spirit but it was hard to get excited with just the two of us. We didn't have enough money for presents so stuck the ice skates and hockey sticks we bought a week prior underneath to try and bulk it up a bit. My dad sent us a hamper which we also stuck under there for more fullness.

Our tree - stupid apartment block wouldn't allow real one due to fire hazard

I was determined to really experience what a white Christmas was all about though. We made goofy Christmas cards to send back to our family and friends in Australia, something we have never done before but it was fun and everyone seemed to enjoy them.

Our personalised Christmas cards

Funny Canadian stereotype sayings inside

After skyping our family back in Australia on Christmas eve (their Christmas day) we walked down to the Airdire Festival of Lights. This is an annual event held in one of the larger parks in town where they decorate with thousands of twinkle lights, have outdoor ice skating on the pond, hot chocolate, Santa and even the polar express. It was a really cold night so my eyelashes froze and I couldn't feel my forehead after a while but we had fun. It was so romantic being out in the cold night surrounded by snow, I went home feeling all warm and fuzzy.

This poece of wood belongs to Airdie

Enjoying the cold - notice frozen eyelashes

The polar express, D wouldn't let me ride it

Random bear that tapped me on the shoulder for a photo

Pretty scene all lit up

Real Christmas trees everywhere

We spent Christmas day eating, lazing about and watching all the seasonal movies we could. Itw as a beautiful sunny day outside but we both agreed at -20 it was too cold to go anywhere. We had roast chicken, ham, potato bake, sweet potato & marshmallow casserole for lunch followed by candy cane ice cream and rumballs for dessert. We drank sparkling apple juice out of mason jars and hot chocolate using our bear coasters. All in all we shared a good day together.

The ham D ate all to himself

Sweet potato & marshmallow casserole was soooo yum. Never heard of it before but apparently it's a favourite here

I make these rumballs every Christmas without fail. Family favourite. Ironically they contain no rum

The next day we got geared up nice and early to head out to the ritual of the Boxing Day sales at Crossiron Mills - the shopping centre containing Bass Pro. I have NEVER seen a shopping centre so crowded even at home. There were lineups around the corners for some of the stores and you literally could not move in some places. We got some fairly good bargains but it took almost all day and we were exhausted by the time we got home.

We had another day off before going back to wor so went ice skating on the pond, only a 10 min walk from our house. Love it so much, just wish i was better at it, fell over a couple of times.



The ice skates we bought from Canadian Tire

Enjoying the ice

For new years we went to dinner with our friends K&L at my new favourite restaurant Swiss Chalet. The hands down do the BEST chicken and gravy sandwich with chips... drool! I had already had a few drinks by that stage so dinner wa a bit of a blur but we then headed to the park for the fireworks show. For a small town they were actually really good and went for ages... there were no public toilets around and I needed to pee so despite my reluctance to, I went in the snow behind a tree. My bum froze but I peed in the snow before D hehehe.

After a few too many at New Years with K&L

To end the night we headed to the local pub where they had a glow party and we sang and danced and drank the night away. The last song they played for the year was by The Black Eyed Peas and actually one we used to sing to our dog, Charles at home. It made me sad for a moment but before long we were counting down to 2013... Happy New Year!

Another job for me.... and that makes three!

So up until now I've had the job at the Science Centre which I left cause we were moving, and then the job at The Body Shop which I left cause I hated. I'm pretty well known as a 'job slut' whereby I only stay at one place for around a year and then move on. The longest I have ever stayed in one job was 2 1/2 years, and it nearly KILLED me, but now on the other side i'd go back there in a heartbeat and actually really miss the work and the people.

Anyway back to the point we had just moved into our new place and it wasn't fair to D to be doing all the work plus overtime and me doing nothing. Not just that but it wasn't fair to me either because I didn't come all the way to Canada to be a stay at home housewife which is what I was turning into. Well.... that and Kim Kardashians most avid watcher with the new recording device on the TV I was watching her TV show re-runs from the moment I woke to the moment D walked through the door.

I was flipping through the paper and came across a part time receptionist position in town 2 1/2 days a week... Well it was better than nothing so I emailed my resume and got a request for interview almost instantly. It was for a fine furniture company and when I walked through the doors I instantly felt like this was somewhere I not only could work, but wanted to. The people were just all so nice and the boss seemed very impressed by the mere fact I was Australian.

The next day I got the call, yes they wanted me... Wooooo hooo! I started work on the 21st December and although the job itself is tedious at times, it's doing work that I enjoy (ie sitting on facebook and blogging hehe) and I get to wear cute office clothes that make me feel good about myself not hideous oversized unisex uniforms the other places wanted me to wear.

All in all, very happy with the job so far however one problem is that we don't currently have a vehicle and on the days I work there is no bus scheduled so I am relying on lifts from my awesome co-workers (covering my ass if any of them happen upon this blog). One morning the lift fell through and I had to walk 45 mins in -20 while my legs felt as if they were being stabbed at all ankles and my nose may as well have fallen off because I couln't feel it attached to my face!

Hopefully this situation will change in the near future though as D and I have both agreed a car, although expensive, will make our experience here much more enjoyable as we can take small trips on out 3 day weekends together and really explore our new surroundings.